Recently, I had one of those days where I was just waiting until I could finally go to sleep. When it was late enough, I turned off my light and sunk into my bed, relieved that the day was over at last. Then I remembered. There was a meteor shower. Laugh all you want, but I go crazy over things like this. I love anything outside and I can seriously sit under the night sky for hours. But this day left me disenchanted. I wanted nothing more than to stay glued to my mattress, tucked in where I felt safe from any other mishaps or disappointments.
Yet, that magical streak flickered in my soul. I leaned over to my window to see if there was any action in the black of night. Nothing that I could tell. I gave it about ten seconds and laid back down, pretty content to stay put. But something was urging me to get up.
I wrapped myself in a blanket and stood in my front yard, face to the sky, eyes dancing about, waiting to be dazzled. Nothing came. I felt myself numbing, adding this to the long list of disappointments from the day. I kept telling myself, a few more minutes, but I felt myself losing hope. I was ready to call it a night and a failure.
Then it happened. I almost missed it as I was turning, but it caught the corner of my eye. A glorious streak of light that could be seen even after it escaped behind a line of trees. I stood awestruck for several moments, the gaping jaw and everything. I then decided if things like that were falling from the sky, I would be able to better survey the action from the ground. So I lay on the pavement and waited.
Things didn’t happen immediately. But the more my eyes adjusted to the darkness, the more I saw the tiny wisps of light dart across the sky. And sometimes, huge glimmering arcs caught me by surprise and made me smile back at the heavens.
I then realized, isn’t this how God and life usually work?
It seems I’m always searching for something. An answer. A direction. Clarity. So many times I get frustrated and foolishly believe that I’ve missed it. But I’m only seeking the answers from the safe little fort I’ve built around myself. I stay locked inside a place that’s guarded, where I won’t be hurt, even if only by disappointment. I only dare to look out the window for a few seconds before I decide that the thing I want isn’t coming. This feels a lot like reason, being responsible, and protecting myself. But it looks a lot like giving up.
What if we tore down our walls that serve only to hinder instead of protect us? We think we are doing a brave thing, fighting off anything that could kidnap us from the tidy life we've created. But what's braver is to destroy all the things that make sense to us and instead follow the prompting within to go out into the dark unknown, to get familiar with uncertain and uncomfortable ground, and to wait for the things our head tell us may never come. To search for the things our hearts know are on their way.
They will come. The answers, the blessings, the direction, the purpose, the people, the opportunity.
We may almost miss them. But just when we least expect it, they will fall into the darkness gathering around us. They will shine light on our path.
We may find they’ve been there all along but we were too blinded by other things to realize their presence. We may find that when we let our eyes, and hearts, adjust to the wild and uncertain surroundings, everything else becomes a little more clear.
I’m in this place. I’ve built a life for myself that’s safe. I may take a small step outward, but I always make sure I have a net in place, something to fall back on. A fence around my plans, so nothing can sneak in and wreck me. A rein around my neck, so I can’t venture too far and be torn to pieces.
Let's stop keeping the world out and ourselves in. Maybe it’s in the place we’ve deemed dangerous where the treasure is found. Maybe it is beyond our lines and limitations that our destiny awaits. Maybe it’s there, where everything looks a little dark and unsure, that God knows we’ll have to trust fully in Him.
There's no way of knowing where we'll end up. The only thing is to take the next step. Get a little uncomfortable. Stand on ground that feels a bit daunting. Change your perspective. Open your eyes. Dare to believe that you were made for more. And that God wants to lead you to it.
Wake up, sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you. Ephesians 5:14
I pray that you wake up. That you dream with your eyes open. That your feet carry you into the wild. That the promises of God and the purposes He has for you will fall into your soul like stars from the heavens and that they will be what light your way.